Easter, peace, healing, love and yoga

04/04/15

When will I ever learn?

Maundy Thursday I was tempted by an Easter bun from the organics. Hand crafted by my friend Tess, who bakes the delicious organic spelt and rye breads I eat. Well, actually it was my hubby Si who bought one. Then I said get me one too. Still have lots of WILLPOWER but no WON’TPOWER at all. It was delicious, but very heavy and doughy.

I woke in the night anxious, as I usually do after wheat. Or was it the red wine? I drink red wine every weekend and only if I have a bit too much does it affect me adversely. It’s my special weekend treat.

In most ways I’ve been taking good care of myself this week. We’ve had fish and veg, or just veg every day. Fish stew, fish pie, mackerel on toast, veggie cheese soup (with goats cheese) and one chicken roast with a ton of steamed veggies.

I’m still having oats for breakfast most days. It’s delicious with coconut milk! I’ve not had a good week though for health. Yesterday, (after the wheat?) I woke up and my fingers crackled with arthritis. That’s new. I’ve had some sharp pains like pins in my right eye a couple of times.

I had lowered my doses of Serrapeptase from 6 a day to 3 a day, but then they were going down so fast and our income is so low that I dropped to 2 a day. Which is nevertheless 480,000 icu, still a hefty dose. But I also dropped the Immunkoplex to every other day.

Not a good idea. Improvements stopped. I’ve done a 35 – 45 minute workout every day this last week. Nearly got that dance routine sorted. And made sure that I got a sweat on and my heart racing as well as did warm up and cool down stretches and yoga. So all muscle pains gone. EXERCISE is like THE MOST IMPORTANT thing we can do for ourselves. As I meditate afterwards for like 20-30 minutes straight after my workout I can almost literally feel the endorphins flood my system. It feels so good in my body after exercising. I can feel how blissed out my whole system gets and meditation after exercise is wonderful. Really creative. I get all my best creative ideas during dancing, yoga and meditation.

Although I said I would stop work I simply can’t do it. It’s not in my nature. Plus, we all need meaning and purpose in our lives. So, actually, there is still quite a lot for me to do and there are several reasons that I need to keep my creative juices flowing. My healing work is my driving force. Hence this blog. I still have one healing client I am working with and also my PHEW group every second week in Wirral.

I have three new work things on the go at the moment as well. I have some young people needing some Holistic Wellbeing tools, so I’ve been working on handouts and a short day long programme to share the practices with them.

I also have a three-day shamanic workshop running in June on Life, Death, Transformation and the Process of Dying. I am simultaneously co-leading and getting trained myself. I have been putting together promotional words, posters, bookings and letters to prospective participant organisations.

Finally, I am going with Jan, my co-lead from this shamanic workshop, to Italy in June, just a few days after the workshop. We are going to Milan for the first ever Transpersonal Festival where we are going to be delivering a workshop and presentation about our shamanic and sound healing practices. I am also brewing ideas for that – we will need a powerpoint presentation for our talk, then an interactive workshop session afterwards. I will be preparing the powerpoint presentation myself, so I need to keep those ideas flowing too.

All great stuff. Exciting. All my ideas come while I am in the flow state – dancing, doing yoga, or meditating. All of these practices are really YOGA – which means UNION, or being one with.

Dancing we are one with our body and the music. Yoga we are one with the body and the breath. Hopefully also, we are one with our soul during dance and yoga, but not everyone is open enough to their authentic self for moving like that. Biodanza helps teach us how to dance our soul! I’ve done a few sessions of that. Also, 5 Rhythms is a wonderful dance/meditation practice that I have done many times. These both help us dance our soul’s energy rather than getting stuck in our ego’s self consciousness, where we care what we look like. When we dance from our soul it is all about expressing how we feel, how we flow, how we roll! It’s nothing to do with what we look like, how others see us, or what anyone else is doing.

During meditation (moving or not) we are one with our breath and our WITNESS consciousness, or Higher Self or Soul (we can experience the Soul as that pure awareness that lies behind the mind, that contains the contents of our mind) – at least if we can shut the chattering monkey voice of the ego up for a few minutes. If we are meditating deeply we completely lose all sense of having a body. If we go even deeper we become one with the Self which is peace, stillness, silence. There is no mental chatter, no emotional resonance. Just deep abiding peace and awareness.

During each of these practices we are in what is called the FLOW state. Where we tend to lose our sense of separate EGO self and become one with a more flowing, open, peaceful state that is outside of awareness of self, time and space.

We get into this flow state when we are being creative also. If you paint or sew, crochet or weave, surf even!!! you can enter this flow. It is a very healing state. Our brainwave patterns change and the resulting effects on the whole system are healing; body, mind, emotions and energetic system are all balanced in this state.

So, I’ve been well enough to dance, meditate, do my yoga and lots of gardening – we have hundreds of seedlings and tiny plants going out into the polytunnel during the day and coming in at night this Easter weekend.

But there is definitely something up. I’m flat. I am having to force myself to do all this dancing, computer work, gardening. My energy is really low. My joints feel more achey and arthritic than usual. My wrists and ankles feel weak and sore again and my eye seems a little more cloudy than before. Not as bad as when I began, but worse than it was ten days ago.

I have ordered and received (within 2 days) more Immunkomplex and Serrapeptase and I’m going back to a higher dose. Plus, I will do less computer time. I’ve blogged less as I’ve been increasing my computer time to do the Death and Wellbeing work. My overall computer time is creeping up again. I’m sure this doesn’t help. I’m going to spend the least amount of time on here as possible and therefore keep the blog to maybe once a week, or twice if there’s a lot to tell.

Let’s face it. At the moment, no one is reading it anyway. So all this time I’m giving to help others via this blog is at this point blowing in the wind, so to speak. But, I will keep going. Just in case. There may be one person who sees this and it helps them. So I keep on keeping on. I do feel that there must be some point to writing it. I must keep on top of it because when I do find what is at the heart of this auto immune thing I will need this record of this journey. I must remember that and use it to motivate me to get on the computer and write.

Until the next time Adieu and I wish everyone out there receives blessings of peace, healing and love.